NATURAL & UNNATURAL SEEKING
The Unnatural (Heavenly) seeking-cycle is the life of the advanced follower. Like the solely natural (worldly) person, he too is driven by limitation and suffering to seek and act to experience that which is a change or improvement of experience, that which is "different" or "better". Yet, unlike the ordinary, religious, and spiritual masses, he is truly seeking God, and his resulting seeking and actions are according to The Way of Freedom. The Way includes the war between his tendency for self-feeding and self-reliance on one side, and his understanding of The Way on the other side.
Like the masses, the follower is always compelled to seek a change and improvement of his experience, by seeking that which is beyond the limitation of him, and by seeking an experience which is other-than his current experience of suffering. That is his natural, inherent, and appropriate tendency, just as all other healthy human beings. The masses seek, and the follower also seeks, but the three main differences between him and the masses, are: What he seeks, and Why he seeks, and How he seeks. The "What" he is seeking is opposite to the masses, because he is truly seeking God, and not more of nature like the ordinary, religious, and spiritual masses. And, "Why" he seeks is opposite, because he is not seeking God in order to experience and self-feed, but to Dissolve in Freedom and Bliss. Finally, "How" he is seeking is opposite, because he is not seeking God through clinging and self-reliance, but through profound Faith, Sacrifice, and Prayer. Also, his natural compulsion to seek, and the fact that he knows nature's way will never suffice, compel him to endure the many years and great travail of self-starvation, on his Way to Realization and Freedom.
He has fully lived, and has fully indulged in, the natural life. He has thereby conceptually and intuitively learned, from his own experience and his Grace-Given insight, that absolutely nothing of nature within or without can Perfectly Fulfill him. He has learned that nothing of nature can offer him Perfect Relief from his state of limitation, nor can it grant him Perfect Happiness, nor can it create Perfect Distraction from either his limitation or his suffering. And, he has learned that he cannot Realize God by his own ideas and efforts. However, having learned all that, he is still, by nature, tending to seek personal experiences, and is still tending to be self-reliant: he is still inclined to cling, implode, withdraw, and self-feed, and is still inclined to be self-willed. But, he typically makes the choice to turn to God, and to continue to seek Him, and according to His Way and not the ego's way. If he does err and over-indulge in nature, the added suffering will remind him of that which he learned but temporarily forgot or ignored, which is that nature cannot Fulfill, and that the very processes of clinging and experience only increase limitation and suffering. However, if he schemes and efforts to avoid experience, he is reminded that any withdrawal from experience is also clinging, and also only increases limitation and suffering: he is merely increasing the clinging to himself and to that "other' to which he is averse.
In the Unnatural seeking-cycle, the follower is still seeking that which is beyond and other-than him, and is, therefore, still seeking change and improvement. But, he is seeking God, and not any thing or any experience of nature, and is not seeking to change or improve any thing of nature within or without. God is the only Unnatural, and there is nothing more Beyond and Other-Than the follower than God. God is certainly Beyond the follower, and is "more beyond" him than anything of nature or form. God is Infinite in "size" and Never- Ending in "distance", while the follower is finite in size. In fact, if the follower were to seek anything but God, he would be seeking that which is finite. God is also completely Other-Than the follower. God is Infinite, Eternal, Supreme Intelligence, Supreme Power, Absolute Bliss, and Formless. God is the Creator and Sustainer of the infinite universe of space and form. None of the aforementioned descriptors apply to the follower, therefore God is certainly completely Other-Than the follower. God is completely Beyond and Other-Than the follower, but, paradoxically, the relationship to God is the most intimate relationship possible. And, God-Realization is the Ultimate Change and Improvement, but is not a Change or Improvement of him, the individual, and is not a change or improvement of his experience. (After Ego-Death and Incarnation, the Mind and Body are certainly Changed and Improved to say the least, but the individual who was seeking the Great Change and Improvement Dissolves in the Process. Also, in Realization, God is not an experience, but is the Core-Level State. In True Realization, no one remains to stand-back from God in order to experience Him.)
We can say that the things of nature are completely beyond the follower, just by virtue of being outside or beyond the confines of his island of separate consciousness. However, the things of nature are not completely other-than the follower, because he shares many of the same qualities, attributes, and functions with the myriad of animate and inanimate forms and processes of nature. Only God is completely Beyond and Other-Than the follower.
The advancing follower, with all his heart and mind, wants to Realize God above all else. One of the many ways God Responds to the follower's Prayer, is by continually Granting conceptual and intuitive understanding of how to live The Way of Freedom.
The follower is being driven to seek by his state of limitation and suffering. He knows that nature's way cannot Fulfill him, and that nothing of nature can Fulfill him, and he is typically not seeking "different" or "better" experiences of nature, just for the sake of having "different" or "better" experiences. Neither is he avoiding experience, and is also not avoiding necessary changes and improvements, in order to "protect" his Spirituality or for any other reason. However, he is still driven to seek that which is beyond and other-than him. But, he knows that seeking more of nature will not work to Fulfill him, and is not The Way. Therefore, he is typically seeking God, the only Unnatural-That, and which is completely Beyond him and completely Other-Than him, and is the Great Change and Improvement. He has also been Given an uncommon conceptual and intuitive understanding. He intuitively sees, on the subtlest levels of self-energy and perception, the striking contrasts between his way of clinging, implosion, withdrawal, experience, self-feeding, scheming, and self-effort, and God's Way of Freedom. He knows from experience that God's Way is far, far better.
He sees how self-energy, and its actions of clinging, implosion, experience, self-feeding, scheming, and self-effort, are nothing but limitation and suffering from beginning to end. Moreover, and this is vitally important, he sees how he cannot approach God using the natural way of seeking. He sees that to approach God more-Lawfully, he must continually Sacrifice all clinging and the very process of experience, and that includes his tendency to try to cling to God, and to experience Him, and to be a "God-Realized individual". He intuitively sees that to try to cling to God, and to experience Him and feed on Him, and to use Him for personal advancement, is no more than an attempt to apply the natural seeking-cycle to God. He knows he will merely increase his limitation and suffering by trying to cling, experience, and feed on God. He sees that his passionate and effortless task is to Faithfully Sacrifice all his self-energy, and all his subtle and gross actions of clinging, implosion, withdrawal, experience, and self-feeding. His Sacrifice is relative to the whole of nature within and without, and is even relative to God within and without. But, his greatest clinging, and which is at the root of all other clinging, is the clinging to himself. He knows that The Path is not about him getting God and experiencing God, and is not about him becoming a Spiritual individual, but is about him Dissolving In God, and ceasing to exist as an individual while the body yet lives. He sees that, instead of clamping-down on himself and God, and thereby further closing himself off from God, he must completely open himself to God, and let God Have His Way with him, which will eventually result in the Perfect Death of self and its ways. The mind, body, and entire life are to become a Vehicle for God, rather than continuing to be a vehicle for himself and the rest of nature. He is not seeking nature, but is seeking God. And, he is not seeking God according to nature's way, but is seeking Him according to the only Unnatural Way.
His attention, self-attention, and entire egoic process are battling in every moment to powerfully re-assert themselves. He is always tending to cling to nature and to God using attention and desire, and he is always tending to implode, withdraw, experience, and self-feed. But, he has an understanding of The Way of Freedom, of which he is conscious the moment he re-turns to God. He realizes it is a stark Path for egoity, but he also knows at its conclusion awaits a Glorious Destiny of Freedom and Bliss.